Is My Animal Companion Happy?

“Is he happy?”

What a good question.

This one causes me to pause.

Because before I answer, I want to ask you something:

What makes you wonder that they aren't?

Is there a behavior you've noticed?

Has something changed?

Do you sense that something just doesn't feel quite right?

Or...

Is there possibly a tinsy-winsy bit of guilt about the three hours of doom scrolling you did while Fluffy sat beside you with his leash in his mouth?

No judgment.

Okay, maybe a tiny bit.

The Answer Might Surprise You

When we ask whether our animal companion is happy, I think sometimes we expect the answer to be about them.

And sure, sometimes it is.

I would be WAY happier if there were a cookie dispenser in this house and I could access cookies whenever I wanted.

Fair.

More treats.

More belly rubs.

More time outside.

Please stop buying that particular food.

And while we're discussing this, I believe the number of walks I'm receiving is completely unacceptable.

Animals have preferences.

They know what they enjoy.

And they are often quite happy to tell us.

But sometimes the answer to “Are you happy?” isn't about a cookie, a walk, or a better bed.

Sometimes it's about us.

They Are Watching Us Too

Imagine asking your animal companion if they're happy and hearing:

I feel sad when I see you not using your voice.

I see you shut down when you don't feel heard.

That's a very different answer.

Because our animal companions aren't simply living alongside us waiting for their next meal.

They're paying attention.

They know our patterns.

They experience our lives with us.

They notice when we're joyful.

They notice when we're struggling.

And sometimes what matters to them isn't getting something more for themselves.

Sometimes what they want is for us to be okay.

Maybe It Isn't Really About the Walk

Imagine the dog who constantly wants to go for a walk.

Every moment of every day.

Walk?

You just got home.

Walk?

We literally just walked.

Okay. But...walk?

It would be easy to assume:

My dog needs more walks to be happy.

But what if you asked?

And the answer was:

I see that you're sad.

I see that you're anxious.

I know you feel better when you're outside.

Being in nature helps you.

Suddenly, all those requests for walks look a little different.

Maybe your dog isn't saying:

More walks will make ME happy.

Maybe he's saying:

Seeing YOU feel better makes me happy.

So let's get outside.

Happiness May Not Look the Way We Expect

I think we sometimes measure an animal's happiness using our own ideas about what a good life should look like.

More adventures.

More toys.

More stimulation.

More treats.

More attention.

More everything.

And sometimes those things absolutely bring our animals joy.

But happiness can also be incredibly simple.

Feeling safe.

Being understood.

Having choices.

Resting in the sun.

Knowing where you belong.

Being beside someone you love.

Having your needs respected.

And perhaps, sometimes, knowing that the person you love is okay too.

You May Be Wondering…

How can I know if my animal companion is truly happy?

Start by noticing them.

Not the animal you think they should be.

Not the life you think they should want.

Them.

What brings them joy?

What helps them relax?

What do they seek out?

What do they avoid?

When do you see their body soften?

When do they seem most completely themselves?

And if you're still wondering, you can ask.

But be open to the answer.

Because when you ask your animal companion:

“Are you happy?”

you may hear about cookies.

You may hear about walks.

You may hear about something they need.

Or you may discover that the being you've been so worried about making happy has been quietly trying to help you find your happiness all along.

May you see the world through the eyes of love, remembering that we are all part of one living, sacred whole.